Homosexual Pedophile

March 6, 2001

Tearful Michael Jackson Calls for Kids’ ‘Bill of Rights’. Norm McDonald would have a field day with this if he was still doing Weekend Update.

Just to get this out of the way, Jackson probably scares me more than any celebrity. He just looks like a monster (eerily similiar to the Alien newborn in Alien:Resurrection, but I digress).

The last celeb to cause me nightmares was Marlon Brando (dressed up like a giant marshmellow) in “Island of Dr. Moreau.” I had that particular nightmare for months.

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